..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
