I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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