Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize