just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Randomize
