Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
