dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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