I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
