I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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