we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize