After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
well you can't waste a boner
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize