Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
