he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
