He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
she peed on how many people?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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