..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
My vagina just clenched in fear
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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