I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
When did angry sex become our thing?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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