Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
