i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
