Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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