How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
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