woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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