exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
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