i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
