So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
