Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
