you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
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Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
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