i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
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she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
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When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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