I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Randomize
