ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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