We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize