Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
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