I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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