I can't breathe out the right side of my face
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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