i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
there is glitter all over my balls
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