There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
