Cold hands, warm shart.
Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
