Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize