I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
where am i from again
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
