Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
