have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
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