Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
