i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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