btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
