my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize