it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
