Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
