I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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