I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Randomize
