She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
