i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Randomize
