I bet he comes in French.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize
