super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Two words: nipple clamps
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